Across the Void
by 21sparkles
Summary: Harry Potter is twenty two years old and utterly devastated. In an alternate universe where his parents weren't killed by Voldemort and he has a little sister named Ivy. And yet he stills feels like he lost everything. With the love of his life gone forever, he slowly begins to unwravel and tell his sister the whole story.
1. Chapter 1

I bit my lip. It seemed that whatever was looming on the horizon wasn't going to stay hidden much longer. A reddish hue colored the skyline, surrounded by thin strips of gold. The old beach chair I sat in was clearly on the verge of collapsing. For some reason though, I just couldn't bring myself to get rid of it.

Maybe I was worried my perfect view of the sunrise wouldn't be the same without the chair. Or perhaps it was the sentimental attachment that kept me from replacing it. It had been a long year.

Suppressing the urge to cry, I recalled the old saying, "Red sky at night, sailor's delight. Red sky in the morning, sailors take warning." It held a sort of comfort and was a phrase I often recollected when I was felt lonely. This was one of those times.

I gripped the splintered wood harder. Cursing, I unclenched my hands. Tiny pieces of wood had embedded themselves in my skin. It stung a little bit more than I had anticipated. Well, I suppose that's what I got for keeping the damn chair. The chair was on a long list of things I was having trouble letting go of.

"Harry?" A soft voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

"You're up early." Responding quickly, I turned around to meet my sister's concerned eyes. I gave her a small smile.

"So, you finally finished it." Ivy looked at me expectantly.

"Yeah."

"Aren't you excited? You've worked so hard on it."

"Yeah." I must not have been convincing enough because she eyed me warily. For a moment, we both gazed out over the lake. I had finally finished my novel.

"I miss her too, you know." Her statement surprised me. Usually, Ivy was much more subtle.

"What?"

"I wish you'd talk about it. I wish you'd tell me. We can't keep pretending nothing ever happened."

"And why not?" I asked angrily.

"I feel like I'm missing something. You can't keep pretending she didn't die." Ivy's tone was growing louder and more fierce.

"Look, I..."

"Why won't you let me help you?! Your laugh is different. Did you know that? I miss your real laugh. It's been almost a year now and I thought it would be back by now. But it's not." Her voice was shrill and fresh tears began to roll down her face. They left shiny streaks on her cheeks that glistened in the early morning light.

"I can't. I don't know what you want me to tell you." I knew exactly what she wanted. I couldn't reassure her though.

"I want to know what happened a year ago. I want you to let me in. _Please_ , Harry." I could hear every ounce of desperation seeping into her plea. My head began to pound viciously. I wasn't sure I could, even if I wanted to.

"Ivy, please. I'm sorry. You know I love you, but I can't give you what you're asking."

"Why not? I want the real you back. I miss you so much it hurts. You look so empty all the time." Ivy was crying hard now. In my twenty-two years of existence, I had never seen Ivy so sad. I knew that if I released everything I kept bottled up, I would be forced to face all the hurt I'd so carefully avoided.

I had become a master at avoiding things. It had led me to fall into a new routine. It was a sort rhythmic flow that I followed. My steady coexistence with the routine helped me to push away all the bad things.

No one but me could see the invisible scars left on my skin. The once gaping wounds had been stifled over time until their cries of indignation could no longer be heard.

Every place I went was tainted with memories. The kind that you re-run in your head all day. They were a bittersweet melody I had been playing on repeat. It was a strange sensation to experience. I wanted to hold on to the memories for as long as possible, but at the same time, I never wanted to relive them again.

For so long I had felt as if I was suffocating on the inside. With her death she stole my oxygen, leaving me sprawled on the ground, trying to teach my lungs how to work again.

Slowly, I could feel my resolve lessen as if it were melting in the sun. Wincing, I began pulling the splinters out of my hand.

"Why don't we go get coffee? I'll start at the beginning."


	2. Chapter 2

The coffee mug was warm and the atmosphere cheery in the small shop we sat in. Ivy leaned toward me across the table, inquisitive eyes begging for the information I'd promised. I could tell she was trying to be patient, but it was unfortunately not her strongest virtue.

"So…"

"So." I pinched the bridge of my nose, as if anticipating a headache. Intentionally scratching a wound seems foolish. And in order to tell Ivy, I would have to scratch at it until it bled. Releasing a breath, I began.

About a year prior, it had been my twenty-first birthday. I was with Draco, Cedric, and Luna at the Three Broomsticks celebrating. I had just gotten a job at the ministry and life was good. The room was full of drunken laughter and I was undeniably happy.

"Aye Harry! 'appy birthday lad. And wish yer mum and dad the best from me!" Hagrid patted me on the back, nearly causing me to fall over.

"Thanks, Hagrid." I grinned and took another swig of butterbeer. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed something strange. Katie Bell was walking out of the bathroom clutching a small package wrapped in brown paper. Her pace was hurried and her head was down. Even with my blurring vision, something seemed… wrong.

Stumbling away from the table, I followed her to the exit.

"Harry, where are you going?!" I could hear Draco calling after me, but I was too concerned with Katie Bell and the strange package. I started walking faster.

"Katie! Stop! Don't open it!" She was too far ahead though and the snow piling up on the ground made it difficult to run. I watched in horror as she started to unwrap the package. Despite the bitter cold and the snowflakes freezing on my eyelashes, I managed to catch up to her. For some reason, the knot in my stomach made me feel as though it were extremely important that she didn't open it.

"Please… don't… open it." I spoke in between gasps for air.

"Harry, what on earth are you going on about? This package has a scarf from my mum. It's a Christmas gift." Undoing the string tied around the package, Katie revealed that there was indeed, only a scarf in the package.

"But, I was so sure that-" Katie laughed gently, and then proceeded to tell me.

"Maybe you ought to get some sleep. You seem a little bit out of it." I nodded and figured she was probably right. But when I looked back at her, my vision doubled. Suddenly her smile was blended with another visual. It was still Katie, but the other version of her was floating in the air with a strange necklace. And then all I could hear was the sound of Katie releasing a blood-curdling scream.


End file.
